Just A Mom

Not me, but close enough.

Good morning son. Sorry I'm late this morning. It's been a rough couple of days. A couple of teary days. Have no idea why. Just is. I won't say I haven't tried to figure it out. Every thing and everyone reminds me of you the last couple of days. I saw an ad this morning for a flex pen you use to use for your insulin and I burst out in tears. It's just been a crying couple of days. I've been so thankful it's been the weekend. I feel so heavy with sadness this last week. I wish I could control all of this. It just hit me out of the blue, there's that color again. Did you misunderstand me last week. When I talked with you about adding blue back into our home I was talking the color blue, not the feeling blue. Get it right next time will ya! lol  I sure do miss laughing with you. I hope you're on a roll in heaven and that they appreciate you and your ability to make people, and angels of course, smile and laugh.

It's suppose to be 74 here today and in the 80's tomorrow. Gino just posted a picture on Facebook of the snow at the end of the season on Willamette Pass.  It seems so odd to have more snow in Oregon this year than here in New York. I'm sure this coming winter is going to be totally different here than it was this past winter. I have plenty to do however and dad will have plenty to read and help me so all is good.

I've been making cards this weekend. I'm trying to get some stock built up so when my Certificate of Authority to charge sales tax comes through I ]'m ready for my "sales/marketing manager", your dad, to hit the streets with the product.  Today I'm finishing up a doll crib for a friends daughter for her birthday. I'll post a picture for you next week. 


Last week, Jamison had an eye infection, conjunctivitis. I don't know how he contracted it but it happened literally, overnight. It's really the first time, other than for annual check-up and shots, that we've had to take him to the vet. He's doing fine now. Dad gave him a both yesterday and he's all soft and fluffy. Next month, haircut! He is such good company for dad and I. We love him so very much. Believe it or not, he's doing better at not barking. In the house anyway. When he starts to bark we tell him good job and thank you. He turns around and looks at us, barks one more time (must be a Jamison thing) and lays back down. Now in the car...a very different story.

Grandpa Coffman

What's the weather like in heaven? Do you get the light, warm rain that you love so much? Does God cry real tears? Does it get hot? Sorry, that's a whole different place. Is there a cool breeze from angel's wings? When the Lord gets angry is there thunder and lightening? Tornadoes? I would imagine when He/She speaks with authority to get a point across it would make the thunder roll. Do you feel comfort in heaven? Do you think about us like we think about you? Is the reason God called you home clear? Why did He need you? Do you know grandpa in heaven? What about your great grand-parents, mamaw, papaw, and great grandpa and grandma? What about your grandma and grandpa Jamison and your uncles that are there? Have you seen any of them? Are there trees in heaven? What about rivers? Right, I forgot, the River of Life. Is that where you sit when you're drawing, writing and writing your music, by the River of Life?

Sorry for all the questions, it's just been a couple of days when all these thoughts and questions are running through my mind. I'm not the only one wondering. I may be the only one voicing the questions, but I know I'm not the only one asking. I know you're not wondering or asking. I know that everything is perfectly clear to you and I know that you don't really understand why I'm asking. I don't know why either. I guess it's probably because I miss you really bad today. It's another one of those times when just about the time I think everything is settled it all pops up again. Corey tells me this is normal. Since I have no idea what normal is, never did, I'm taking that to mean it happens to everyone when someone they love dies. It's really tough to have days like this. It doesn't take anything for me to cry and your poor dad wants so much to make it all better. I cry when I see the news about the tornadoes,  I cried when a Police Chief dies last week, two weeks before he was scheduled to retire. Explain that one to me will you. I watched many of my friends die soon after they retired from the City. Why? They work 25/30 years for an organization they believed in and loved and within weeks/months of their retirement, were gone.





Until next week, be Aaron. I love you, mom