Resolute

Happy New Year son! It's beginning as a white one. It snowed all day yesterday and has been absolutely beautiful. Today we have a high of 19 degrees and expecting more snow. Today, I also have the beginnings of a cold. I've fought the good fight, but I've lost. It's been a very long time since I've had a cold. In fact I can't remember the last time, but I certainly do recognize the cough, runny nose, watery eyes and just feeling physically lousy. You know dad, it's NOT due to lack of vitamins! I began taking Zicam this morning with the hope that even though I've acquired this visitor, he won't stay around very long.

I'm finding it is becoming easier and easier to sit here on the couch and watch it snow while reading, or crocheting, or looking through Pinterest, or talking with dad, or watching a movie or any of the other things that I dreamed of doing in bad weather....other than running off to work. I could really get use to this. I know that's hard for you to believe. I think dad thinks I'm a little "off my game" since I'm not up staying busy. But to tell you the truth, I'm very much enjoying it.

Dad's out shoveling the front porch and steps and Jamison is right there "helping". I'm trying to stay focused on my conversation with you but it's become more difficult every minute between, "you gotta see this" and let's take a picture and helping Jamison so he can see out and see dad focusing is a little difficult this morning. BUT, fun too! Jamison loves the snow. With his tiny. short legs, if he weren't black, you'd loose him in the snow.

Do you have snow in heaven? I highly doubt it but then again I have no trouble picturing it swirling around all the sparkles and shimmers of the pearls, jewels and gold. How pretty that would be. Dad and I were just talking yesterday about the "angels hair" we use to put around those big Christmas lights we use to put on the tree and how beautiful it was to see the light filter through the angel hair. Maybe you've seen some of that in heaven? Lights through angel's hair as they celebrated the birthday of Jesus. What a wonderful gift He gave to us. And now, as we approach another new year what an amazing opportunity we all have. A new beginning so to speak. To start fresh and new. I know, I know, all the same old problems and challenges will still be there facing us, but this is a new opportunity to look at those problems and challenges with fresh eyes and ideas. It's a chance to say okay let's take a look at this and see what I can do to make a difference. It's probably going to be something that no one else will even know I've done. But, I will know. I'm looking forward to the opportunity to look at my world through fresh eyes. I don't have an angels eyes but I do worship the same God so in essence, I guess I do have angels eyes. Eyes that have the ability to see past all the trouble and problems and see the joy. Eyes that have the ability that adds the warmth to my smile. Eyes that have the ability to focus on the good no matter where I am or what is happening. I'm not an angel, (stop laughing) by any means of the word, but like I said, we know the same God. 

As you know, I've never been one, and still am not, for making New Year's resolutions. I can be very resolute however. 

 res·o·lute  

/ˈrezəˌlo͞ot

Adjective Admirably purposeful, determined, and unwavering.

Synonyms determined - firm - decided - resolved - decisive

I like the "admirably purposeful". Although at times I know many have used the term "stubborn" to describe my purposefulness and I am sure they have been right. But, let's get back to the topic of the new year. I so want this year to be full of purpose. I want it to have meaning. I want dad and I to realize our purpose here in Troy NY. I know all the reasons we chose to be here but I just feel as if God has a greater purpose. I want this new year to be the year we discover God's purpose. That God will reveal that purpose to us both and that when He does we will accept it and live our lives to the fullest to complete the purpose He sets before us with joy in our hearts. 

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom

Merry Christmas 2012

Merry Christmas eve, eve son!  I'm late getting started with our conversation this morning I know. Dad has been letting me sleep until I wake up since my trip and unfortunately, I'm not waking up until about 10:00 am. I must be having more difficulty with the time change than I thought.  As I look out the living room window this morning I can see flakes of snow as they drift toward the ground. The weather prediction for Christmas eve and Christmas day is snow. We've had several days of snow here in December but nothing has stuck. It's really beautiful just to watch and to imagine that every single, right now minute, flake that falls has an identity of it's own. No two are alike. Just like us. I know that Christmas is considered to be the season of miracles but as I sit here and watch the tiny flakes fall I can't help but to think about the miracles that are around me every day. It's amazing to think that God knows the number of grains of sand on the beach. Just consider the fact that the "beach" flows under the ocean waters as well as what we can see along the ocean borders. And consider the fact that He knows the "cattle on a thousand hills" as the song writer wrote. Hey, I consider it a miracle that God loves me. I know how much your dad loves me. But to think that God loves me more? How much is more? How could there even be any more. I don't think there's any way for us to know how much God really loves us and how many miracles really occur in our lives every day. I wonder what it would be like if we could see the miracles as they happen. I wonder how many times we see a miracle and brush it off to coincidence? It is true, God is a maker of miracles. We have to believe. We have to trust. We have to know that God wants only the best for us. We have to know that His plan works in the best of timing. His timing. We have to do all that God gives us the power to do on our own and then trust that God's timing is perfect. As difficult as that must be.  To not believe, to not trust, to "force" our time table on God's miracle is saying we know better than God. If we love and trust our earthly father who has "miracle" limits, how could we not trust our Heavenly Father who has no limits?

I've been watching every Christmas moving I can possibly see this Christmas season. Some I have seen before but for the most part the ones I have seen are new to me. It seems they have the same theme. Something bad has to happen in order for the miracle to happen Last night we watched a couple of the "Touched By An Angel" Christmas shows. In trying to explain why the person had died the reason given was, "they had finished what God had given them to do". It raises a question for me in that I didn't think we ever finished what God has given us to do but then again, we are all created for a purpose. That purpose is to glorify God. Anyway, I'm getting off track here. The natural question for me, given that thought, is naturally, what purpose did God have for you here on earth that you finished? Dumb, I know, but a natural question for a parent. I know I certainly wasn't ready for you to be finished. You had a full, talented life ahead of you, children to have and raise, people to touch and bless. Who knows where your talents would have taken you. And yet God said, you are complete.It's funny. As I write this I thought I would get angry, but I'm not. God shared you, a miracle, with me. You were living proof that miracles occur every day. Babies are born every day. What better way to see a miracle than to bring a baby into this world. There just isn't one. Think about the cycle of life is amazing and a miracle in itself.  The doctor didn't believe that there was any way he could bring you into this world alive. And yet, there you were for 38 years. Alive, breathing and praising Him. Just as you were created to do. And, we were privileged to be an integral part of God's miracle. To raise you, take care of you, provide for you, love you, enjoy your wonderful hugs, hear your laughter, wipe away your tears, share your pain and have you love us in return. What greater miracle could anyone ask?

Aaron Matthew Jamison

As dad and I enjoy this Christmas season we "hear' your laughter around us as we bring out the memories of the Christmas toys, the ornaments, the pictures of Christmas' past and share stories. Dad and I continue to look for miracles each and every day. We get anxious. We get upset  because we can't do all those things for people that we use to do. We get fearful at times because we can't see the answer. Sometimes trust and miracles seems so far away and out of our reach. BUT, down deep in the deepest places in our hearts, we KNOW, God is in the miracle business, He wants only what is best for us and His miracle is in the making for 2013 and always. Merry Christmas son! We know you remain a special son in the eyes of the King and your Heavenly Father. Just as you do in ours.

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom

So Many Things To Celebrate

Good morning son. How are you this freezing Groveland morning? I guess you really don't need to worry about weather in heaven do you? The weather here the last couple of weeks has been exceptional. We've had sun, rain, snow....and I've enjoyed it all. Dad said in his email to me this morning that they're expecting snow today in Troy and then rain the next couple of days. I head home Tuesday afternoon.

Yesterday was the Atkins family Christmas so the house was full. It was great to see everyone. I baked and made candy for two weeks. We didn't get the Spritz Cookies made, nor the Rocky Road candy but I don't think anyone missed either. Clay, Meg and the boys decided to leave last night for home rather than this morning. Eric, Kim and Noah spent the night so they could visit this morning. I've evidently lost track of time  because I didn't realize it was Sunday until grandma said she had watched Charles Stanley this morning. It dawned on me at that point I'd best get to writing.

Even having the seven kids in Troy to enjoy, (Did I just make a rhyme?) , it's amazing when you add seven more kids. They had a ball together and they were all so good. Grandpa (Ron) got out his remote helicopter and car and believe it or not, in the house, and they all played for hours. They watched movies, played bull fighting, played games on their iPads and ate. Rita was here to experience some of it. Clay, Meg and the boys arrived Friday night so she was able to experience Seth, Layne and Cole before everyone else arrived. It gets pretty lively around here when there are 30 people in the house, but such fun. It's great to have everything ready and just be able to sit back and watch everything in motion.

Rita had to leave yesterday so I ran her to the airport. It was suppose to be crazy weather so we left for the airport early for Sacramento. Outside of rain, the weather ended up being good. I don't know what time Rita got it but the last I heard she was experiencing delays in San Francisco due to the fog. I'll have to check later this morning to make sure she got home okay. I'd text her but the coverage here in Groveland is almost nil so I'll email.  She and I both should have brought a bigger suit case.

Memories

I'm looking forward to being back home with dad and Jamison. It's been so much better this time to have the availability of email. We've talked every day too but I know they're both ready for me to be home. Dad was going to do all the Christmas decorating while I was gone.  What do you want to bet it didn't happen? LOL If he's got the Christmas tree up and decorated I'll be happy. I want to spend more time decorating the front porch than in the house this year. I have some great ideas and want to make some fresh boughs with pine cones for the porch. Dad said this morning that they say we're going to have a white Christmas. How cool would that be!

Christmas with you was always so much fun. As fun as it was when you were little I think I enjoyed the Christmases more the older you got. You just loved it so much. We sang carols, you wore your Santa hat beginning in July. Such good memories. All the fun and yet you always knew what Christmas was really about. The birth of Jesus.  As I've shared with you so many times before, what His mother must have endured. What she must have felt as a mother, holding her infant son, knowing what His future was going to be. What a faith she must have had. How strong she must have been. How much trust she must have had in her Heavenly Father. And Joseph, how much trust and love he must have had for Mary.  What a miracle that birth was. I don't think there is any way for us to know how Mary and Joseph or what they experienced when Jesus was born. What an amazing night and journey that must have been. I'm looking forward to having a conversation with Mary when I get to heaven. I want to thank her for the sacrifice she made. I know how my heart aches. I cannot imagine the pain and agony she experienced. I am so thankful she was willing.

Enjoy the preparations in heaven for the Christmas season. Decorate, sing, share, go caroling with the angels and celebrate Jesus' birthday with Him!

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom  

19 Days...But Who's Counting?

Trichelle and Jenny - It's cookie baking time!

Good morning son! Well, I guess I should really be honest about it cause I don't want you to think you're "loosing it". It's really noon here in California on Saturday. I know, I know, I'm early but there is so much going on I didn't want miss telling you about it. Today is bake day for the Christmas party on December 15th. Actually, I've been baking all week but there baking cookies and making candy today. Most of the gang is here. Trichelle and her four, Hannah, Kaleb, Zach and Abby. Jenny and her little one, Dennis. Heather, Mom, Diane, Ron and me. They're baking sugar, oatmeal, oatmeal chocolate chip, buttermilk,ginger, Spritz, and date cookies. Rocky Road, fudge, and peanut brittle candy. I've made four fruitcakes, two loaves of apricot/walnut bread and four dozen cinnamon rolls. A couple of days before next Saturday's party I'll bake a couple of Raisin Walnut pies. We're going to have lasagna, green salad and garlic bread for lunch next week. It will be a lot of fun. Wish you and dad were here.

Diane and I will go to the airport next Tuesday and pick Rita up. She'll be here through the 15th. We'll bake more, read, watch more Christmas movies, go to the Consignment Store, maybe back to Twain Hart to the Country Pharmacy, maybe Jamestown, maybe just stay in and read and eat. Who knows, we kinda play it all by ear.

I've been talking with dad every day and we write frequently via email. It's so nice to have email. I remember in the "olden" days we couldn't call very much because it was long distance and it took a week to get cards sent. I was usually only gone a week, or dad was, so dad usually packed cards and notes throughout my luggage...along with vitamins!  This time, it's an entire case full of vitamins and pills. But on the upside, I only had to bring a small carry-on because both Auntie Di and Grandma have a washer and dryer so I don't have to bring all the clothes I use to pack.

It's beautiful here on the mountain. Most days have been sunny and clear. The last couple of days the fog (Remember the coastal fog?) has rolled in later in the afternoon. Last night was chilly but I don't think the weather has been anything near what dad and Jamison have been experiencing, ice rain! It hasn't stopped them from the daily walk though. Dad said the other day when he came back he had to give Jamison a warm bath to wash off the icicles. I guess every day Jamison has caught the scent of either a rabbit or a deer and chased them out of their respective beds. One day Jamison caught dad off guard and took off running. Dad said he had to run to keep up and ended up in "Brier Rabbit's thicket" at the top of a knoll. It must have been pretty funny seeing this little 20 pound dog, running from mound to mound tracking a rabbit while dad, bundled up like the kid in "Christmas Story" running on one good knee, a knee brace and a cane trying to keep up without toppling over! If they had been running down hill Jamison would have probably been dragging dad. It's a funny sight to think about but it wouldn't have been very funny if he had fallen cause I wasn't there for him to call for help.

A mother's love for her son shines through.

I can hardly believe that Christmas is only a few days away. By now, you would have been wearing your Santa hat since July and singing Christmas carols. I was just thinking yesterday about all the years we made Christmas cookies. We did it every year since you were three except for your last year. It was always such fun.I'm looking forward to looking through the Christmas album with dad before Christmas this year. Memories are a two-edged sword. They can be wonderful and at the same time, cause such great pain. I often wonder about Joseph and Mary and the memories they had with their child. They were parents and wanted the same things for their son that dad and I wanted for you. They were human just as dad and I are human. Sometimes I think we put them up on a "different level" but if I really stop and think about it, they were a mom and dad just like dad and I are a mom and dad. They wanted what was best for their child. They sent him to school, took him shopping, cared for and worried about him when he was ill. Clothed and fed him. Joseph had a job and worked everyday for his family. They went to church. They had friends and family and shared special family events. Mary took care of the home, invited guests to their home, made their clothes, all those things that dad's and mom's do every day. Mary must have had an amazing faith.And just think, today, both of our sons are in heaven together. So many centuries apart, ending up in the exact same place, together. Quite amazing isn't it when you think about it.As a mother, I know, even though she knew from the beginning what the outcome was going to be, she would have changed nothing to have had those few years with him while he was here on earth. I wouldn't either. However, that doesn't mean that this mom, here on earth, doesn't shed tears for what she has lost and the things that will never be, I know in my heart that God has a much bigger plan.

While we're talking about it, or actually, while I'm talking about it, what IS Christmas like in heaven? We've talked briefly about this before I think. Talk about lights! Streets of gold glistening in the sunlight. The pearly gates gleaming from their daily polishing. The colors of the rainbow in the sky as the sun shines through windows of precious stones blue topaz, ruby, emerald and sapphire.How amazing life must be for you now. Do you sing Christmas carols with the angel choir? You forgot your guitar when you left but I imagine there is every musical instrument you could possible want in heaven and that you now have the ability to play them all. You were so talented while you were here, I can just imagine how you've turned things upside down in heaven. Enjoy!

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom

42 Years and Counting

Good morning son! I'm visiting with grandma and family in California right now. We currently in the midst of a wind and rain storm. And I do mean storm. It hit last night before we went to bed and is really roaring this morning. We'd planned on going to church this morning but it wouldn't be safe to go out in it this morning. The trip here went as planned and on time which was a great thing. We've been watching Hallmark movies, visiting, eating and decorating. Well, actually all the grand kids did the decorating and we sat and watched. The did a great job. It was raining so hard out that they just got about half the decorations out front but they're finish it when the storm lets up. Dad says they have snow at home, about 3-4 inches. He and Jamison went on their walk yesterday and dad says when they got back Jamison had icicles hanging off his belly. Dad washed him off and wrapped him up in a blanket and he took a nap.

Watching Hallmark movies certainly brings back so many memories of our Christmases together. How you loved Christmas. I must say, I shed some tears yesterday but I managed to hold myself together for the most part. We didn't have a tree last year but dad is determined this year. We brought everything up before I left and he says he's decorating while I'm here. We'll finish up when I get home. I have some great ideas for the front porch and am really looking forward to putting it all together.

Rita is coming here for a visit Dec 11-15. It will be so good to see her and have a good visit. She loves visiting with mom and Diane as well so we'll have a great time. We'll probably include some baking in her time here and a trip to the Country Store in Twain Hart as well. It will be a good time.

This is probably going to be a short conversation this morning. Because of the storm, I guess, the Internet is bouncing back and forth and is having some trouble when I try to save. Needless to say I will be very unhappy if I loose what I have already written. Been there, done that!

This Wednesday, December 5th is dad and my 42nd anniversary. As I stop and try to remember those years I am amazed. I cannot even imagine my life without your dad in it. And the great thing is, after 42 years, I never even try. I look forward to so many more years together. As with all couples there are good times and bad times. To say that life has always been blissful would be an untruth, or as you would have put it, a lie. You were never one to  mince words. Don't know where you got that trait. Dad and I were just talking the other day about our life together. It seems as though it was just yesterday when we were traveling to Santa Cruz with an organ in the back of the "hopped up" Ford wagon had. We hauled them all over the county and dad would take them into people's home for a demonstration. Very seldom did we ever have to haul one back!

It has been a very eventful life and as we've always told you, never boring. We've lived in many places and made many friends and met many people. Over the years we've had the opportunity to share our life together with many. Dad has preached the Word, "helped" Santa, helped others, loved me, loved you, shared his wealth (whatever it happened to be at the time), been there for us in good times and rough times. He's the man of my heart and I love him with all my heart. Grandma use to tell us when we were of the dating age to not date anyone we would not consider marrying. As kids usually do with most parental advice, we nodded and went on our way. She was right. The minute I laid eyes on your dad I was a gonner and it hasn't changed in 42 years. I didn't have a chance. You were one of the most amazing gifts God ever brought into our lives. IF I could do it all over again, knowing the outcome you can bet I would do all the same things.You were the joy in our life. God allowed us 38 years and although I will always miss you and your laughter and hugs it's amazing that I find I see you in dad's eyes and hear your laughter when he laughs. I guess I just needed to look.

I don't know what the future holds for dad and I but I do know that God knows and for right now I'm content in that.

Before I leave today I want to wish my hubby a very happy anniversary. I'm going to miss you Wednesday. We've never missed one together BUT I'm looking forward to celebrating with you on January 9th. Thank you for this trip to visit family and for being willing to share my time. I love you, since the first day I met you and forever more.

December 5, 1970

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom

A Mom's Strength and Love

Good morning son! Well, our second Thanksgiving without you...we survived. It has been a beautiful Fall season and a warm and wonderful time of being especially thankful. Dad and I cooked our turkey, yes, and "stuffing" as Jon says, not dressing. And, your grandma's wonderful Cranberry Crunch Jello Salad. Thanksgiving and Christmas wouldn't be complete without that jello salad. In fact, how does anyone even eat turkey with out that cranberry salad? People don't know what they are missing. Thanksgiving evening we officially began the season by watching "Home Alone" and "Christmas Story".

 Last night was Thanksgiving dinner with the Troy 9. The kids choose a recipe, shop and prepare the meal. They made some amazing dishes; souffle, "stuffing" Brussels Sprout Slaw, mashed potatoes, cornbread, crescent rolls, fresh cranberries, roasted chicken, angel food cake, pumpkin pie, Rice Krispy Treats and a concoction Corey cooked up. She said it was a recipe but I have my suspicions. Onions, Parmesan cheese, fennel and something else she baked in the oven. I think it's just something she dreamed up to see if I would be willing to taste it. She and I tasted it and then the chicken's got dinner! I don't know, but it might still be laying out there in the chicken pen.

Ruby Cranberry Crunch Salad

2 - 3 oz. Cherry or Raspberry jello

2 cups boiling water

1 cup cold water

2 tablespoons lemon juice

1 - #1 can Whole Cranberry Sauce

1 cup thinly chopped celery

1/2 cup chopped walnuts

Dissolve jello in boiling water; stir in cold water and lemon juice. Chill mixture until thick and syrupy. Fold in remaining ingredients and mix well. Pour into a 2-quart jello mold or a 9x12 pan. Chill until set.

Josie, rocking horse & reindeer

Josie came over on Friday and she and I took down and put away all the Fall decor. She's a great little helper. She gathered all the ceramic and glass, which is quite a bit, and wrapped it all in tissue paper. After that is, she sang a pumpkin song and made them all dance!  She then had a clear road to get out "her" rocking horse and rocking chair where she proceeded to give her rocking horse a "bath" with a wet wash cloth and ate a candy cane while giving her reindeer a ride on her rocking horse. A good time was had by all.

I see the wonder in her eyes.

I'm ready to display my t-shirt quilt.

Friday afternoon dad and I moved ALL the Christmas decorations upstairs. Last year we just put out a few things. Dad is determined to go the entire route this year while I am gone. It will probably take him that long. However, 12-13 tubs of decorations in no way compare to a garage full, an 8x10 storage shed from top to bottom and side to side and the better portion of a 12x16 storage shed...all Christmas decorations when we lived in Oakdale CA. Remember? We use to have to begin November 1st to get it all done. The last Christmas there dad and grandpa put 10,000 lights in the yard alone. We had a friends and family open house every year with dad as Santa. Grandma and I made cookies and candy for days before and hot spiced cider. Those times were some of the most fun we've had in 42 years of marriage. Our Christmas village, including a train, took the tops of two 4x8 sheets of plywood in the window of the family room. If I remember correctly, you and dad even talked me into going caroling that year. We just about froze our hiney's off. That valley fog is mighty cold. Christmas has always been such a joyful time for all of us. Sure, it was a lot about buying things and giving things. But most of all it was about the wonder of a baby boy being born and mission that God had for Him. I look at Christmas with different eyes now. I have to wonder what my life as a mom would have been if I had known what Mary knew when her son was born; that his life would be required of Him at an early age. That He was being brought into the world for an express purpose, to die. Now I know, everyone eventually dies. But I have to think, since I am a mom, that knowledge, prior to conception, would have terrified me.How would she have coped all those years wondering every single day, "is this the day". When He disappeared and went to the temple, did she wonder if that was the time. When he traveled miles and miles along dusty, dry roads preaching did His mom know where He was. Did He stay in daily contact with her? How would He have done that. You and I always talked every other day, if not every day. And I have to tell you, I never, ever in my wildest dreams, thought your life would be required of you at 38 years old. Why would I? That happens to everyone else, not me. There is a reason God does not tell us the future. Your illness and death is a good example of why. As I sat in that hospital room that day and heard the doctor say those words, "stage four colon cancer, 3-6 months" and I watched your face I was filled with awe. You appeared calm. You asked questions as if you knew what you needed ask. Neither of us cried at that moment. I think we both knew that if one of us did it would be over for both of us.Tears came later after the doctor left. As I think back to Mary I think what an amazing mom. She knew the inevitable, she basically had no time or connection with her Son after about twelve years old. He knew His mission and she had known from conception what His life would be. What a woman and mom of courage!

God gave us so many good times together but I think our Christmases will always be the strength of those memories. Dad and I were trying to remember last night the first time you read the Christmas story on Christmas day. If we remember right, you were twelve. What a message of joy and hope you left here for us. You lived a life spreading joy and hope and you died carrying that same message. Dad and I have that and we will always be grateful to you for that. You were determined that we remember the joy, and we do. Joy is what Christmas is all about. Sharing that joy and that message is a very important part of our lives. This past year has been one of healing. I don't know if things will ever be "normal" again. Just about the time I think I have it all together, I loose it. But I will continue to live and celebrate the joy that your life brought to mine and dads. This year, I promise you, we will find a new way to share our joy with others once again.

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom

Always An Opportunity to be Thankful!

Good morning son!! How are you this beautiful morning? It's 9 a.m. here in Troy NY and 28 degrees this morning. The sun is out bright and dad has already made his Sunday morning run with Jamison to pick up the Sunday paper. I can hear dad in the kitchen getting the coffee ready. I love the smell of fresh coffee in the morning; especially Sunday morning. Although I don't have to rush off to work any more and sometimes I forget what day of the week it is, I always still enjoy Sunday mornings and having coffee and ready all the ads. I very seldom have the need to buy anything but I just never know what idea is going to pop into my head when I look through the ads from Joanne's, Michael's and A.C. Moore craft stores. Like I need more ideas to pop into MY head!

Dylan - ready for the oven!

The week before us is the week of Thanksgiving. It will again be a great week. Different, but great. The kids will be cooking a Thanksgiving dinner again this year, probably on Saturday when everyone is home. It really is a lot of fun; all of them in the kitchen making whatever dish they choose. You'd think the meal would be slanted in some way, all desserts or main dishes but somehow it all rounds out itself. They have to cook from start to finish. That means decide what they want to prepare, do the shopping, cooking and cleanup. It's always been yummy. Who knows, we could end up with that mean old rooster on the table!

Dad and I bought a small turkey and I'll make some cornbread dressing and grandma's famous Cranberry Crunch Jello Salad. We were buying groceries anyway may as well fix a turkey. (No, I know you want to, but don't go there! I don't know why I continue to give you glaring opportunities like that. It's not intentional, it just happens.)

Well, all this month people on Facebook have been sharing daily what they are thankful for.I have not joined the forces but continue to think about thankfulness and what it means to me and my life.  I continue to be amazed at the things in my life for which I am thankful or need to be thankful.  I do have to say that it disappoints me that there seems to be a rush to run past the being thankful part into the "I want", "I need", "my kids have to have", "my wife or husband can't do without" part of the season.  For me, and I can only speak for me, thankfulness needs to remain high on my priority list. Dad and I always tried to teach you that before anything else, being grateful and thankful should be on your list. Each and every day there is something to be thankful for in every one's life. Thankfulness comes in many forms and in many degrees. There's the thankful that, "Hey, I woke up again this morning!". There's the thankfulness of, "My child is safe at home" or "my loved one wasn't on that plane that crashed today". But, there are the thankful times when sometimes we forget we need to be thankful. Everyone knows when those happen. Maybe we say it quietly as we hug someone with tears streaming and saying a quiet, "thank you God". Sometimes we say those quiet thank yous because to show too much emotion would scare a child because that child didn't know they were in danger. But you knew. You knew what the outcome could have been and you are so thankful the outcome gave you the opportunity to be thankful.

As I have been thinking about opportunities to be thankful, this month especially, it has become very clear to me the opportunities are there in everything we do. I'm thankful I'm able to get out of bed every morning. Some people can't experience that luxury any longer. I'm thankful I can put my shoes on when I need or want to. I'm thankful I wake up every morning next to your dad who loves me beyond any words contained in the human language. And whether I like it or not, and I don't, I'm thankful that you are no longer in pain, such excruciating pain. I'm thankful God shared you with us here for 38 years. I'm thankful for family and friends on both sides of the United States and those in the middle. I'm thankful that God provides our needs and when we least expect it, our wants. I'm so thankful that as I have gotten older and progressed through life my wants have slowly diminished. I use to think it odd when I'd hear my grandparents say they really didn't need anything. I'd think to myself, how could you possible not need anything. I don't think it's the "need" that goes away, it's that as you get older you redefine what "need" is.

Thanksgiving has always been a huge part of our lives. Both being thankful and the actual annual celebration on Thanksgiving Day. We fix dozens of our favorite dishes. We overeat. We laugh. We tell stupid jokes. We play games. We share.

I am so very thankful for all the joy and laughter you brought into our lives!

Thanksgiving Day will probably never again be like it use to be. But then again, what day ever is. Happy Thanksgiving!

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom

Me, God's Project

I never tire of hearing this promise.

Good morning son! A new day! And just how is it in heaven today? If you get tired of me asking that, tough! lol  I'm sitting here as usual looking out of the living room window and at the back profile as Jamison as he takes in what's happening outside this morning. The birds are getting more scarce every day at the bird feeder. The squirrel comes every day and sits on the railing looking up at the bird feeder. I can't read his mind but all too often he sits there and glares into the window at me and Jamison. I would bet that he's swearing up a storm because we've figured out the perfect spot that no matter where he climbs he's just a little too far away to jump and reach that bird feeder. For a few days we'd see him fly through the air, hear a thump and then in a few minutes he'd appear back on the railing looking through the window with that look in his eyes. But now, he just sits on the railing staring up at the feeder. But I know what he's thinking!

We haven't seen the fox in about a week now. The last time we saw him he was was calmly walking up the driveway, taking his time, and stopped in front of the porch looking up at the window just long enough to alert Jamison that he was on his turf and "ha, ha, you can't get me". The fox has certainly grown and he has a huge tail. His color was much more brilliant and coat shiny when he was younger. He looks more scraggly now. Of course, if I lived in a dirt hole I imagine I'd look old and scraggly too. Don't say it! I know, you're dying, well maybe not dying, I wouldn't want you to have to go through that again, but I know that would have been a one-liner lead-in for you on any day. I love you son. Miss your laugh and your jokes. I hope you're liberally passing out those hugs in heaven because I'd hate for them to go to waste.

 Last week I saw my first white-tail deer. She was so beautiful and appeared to be all by herself. She popped up in the trees and brush about 20 feet from the front of the car as I opened the car door. I watched her until she disappeared up the slope and over the top of the rise. What a beautiful site. I just sat there and watched the graceful movements and she made her way. In all the deer we have here and see in the yard this has been the first white-tail I've seen. I'd love to see another. 

A walk on a Fall day.

Our daily walks are getting much colder. You know if I have to put a coat, hat and gloves on, it's cold. We don't realize how cold it is sitting here in our little pocket. But when we get to the top of the hill as we take our walk and that wind whips around we notice it then. Jamison is even wearing his sweater. It's been in the 20's here some nights. It probably won't be long before we begin getting some snow. Auntie Di said they had about five inches in Groveland this past week. I'll be headed out for my visit in about two weeks. I've looking forward to it. Not the trip, but being there and visiting with everyone. And...Christmas is only six weeks away. Where has the year gone?

$40 hutch - before

and after!

I continue to work on my projects. I am so thankful to have the time and energy to spend on projects. Most have been waiting for over a year. They've been patient and so have I. I finished the kitchen hutch last week. It came out exactly as I wanted. Dad helped me reassemble it. It's much different working on a big project like a hutch now than it was even ten years ago. Our eyes don't work as well, getting down on our knees to rehang the doors is not even an option. Our shoulders don't work as well, can't get them over our head or hold them up long enough to get all the screws in the hinge at one time so we have to put one screw in, rest the shoulders, put another. When you're doing that 36 times it takes a while. It takes even longer when you put the hinges in backwards and have to take three of them out and reinstall. But, we worked together, accomplished the goal and had super fun and laughter as we laughed at ourselves, took the breaks we needed and accomplished the goal. We only paid $40 for the hutch on Craigslist. Just take a look at the difference. I'm so proud of what we accomplished with a little bit of paint and a ton of elbow grease.

Remember my old screen door that dad laughed at when I refused to leave it when we moved? That poor thing has been painted every color of the rainbow and then some. I've used it as a room divider, on the wall as a display for pictures and just standing in a corner as an architectural piece. Now I'm in the process of redoing it as a display stand for quilts and linens. I've painted it mustard and hot pink, added some mod-podge hydrangeas and hot pink hardware, putting it on a stand and voile', a linen stand. I'll have to include a picture next week because it isn't quite finished yet. Kinda like me. God isn't finished with me yet either. (He isn't is he?  Just kidding.) I am so thankful that God's eyes don't wear  out. His shoulder's don't give out. Whose shoulder would I cry on if His shoulders gave out? His knees always stay strong. That really important because when I fall, and I do often, He's still able to kneel down, reach out a hand and lift me up. A project I am and always will be while I am here on this earth. Someone that needs refreshing and re purposing. Someone who always needs a helping hand and sometimes, a firm hand. (I just added that before you did.) My life with the Lord has evolved into more of a quiet, peaceful one. It's not so much about being "out there" but more of a constant, mindfulness of His presence in my life. A thankfulness that I know He is with me. It's a wonderful peace. I know, without a doubt, that no matter what "project" I am, He is the master carpenter and will make all rough edges smooth and will keep the color in my life.

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom

Gopher Holes and All

Good morning son! How are you this morning? It's a beautiful, cold (35 degrees) morning here. Cold but the sun is trying to struggle  through. Kinda like I feel today; trying to struggle through. Just tired that's all. I should be okay with the fact that I don't feel like getting up and "hitting it" every day but somehow if I can get up and don't feel like "hitting it" I feel lazy. Is lazy good? I don't know. Who cares anyway? The important thing is that I feel right? This is starting off really crazy isn't it? Can you tell I didn't sleep well last night?  There's just nights like that I guess. My brain just isn't clicking in this morning.

We survived the storm just fine. It helps when you're surrounded by solid rock and sit on a hill! Kinda like life huh. When you build your life well and surround yourself with the important things in life, or what I consider important for me, life is good. There are always bumps in the road, 'cause of the gophers I think, but how would we recognize the smooth road if there were no gopher holes?

Okay, let's try this again. I've had lunch and some coke. Well, actually Pepsi. Don't want anyone to get the wrong idea. Let's get back to the gopher holes in the journey. They are everywhere you know. Sometimes we recognize them, sometimes not. They're all there for a purpose. Sometimes to make us veer so we don't break a strut. Sometimes because if we hit the hole we'd loose a tire, or break and axle or worse yet, run over a squirrel.

Sometimes we're so focused on the gopher holes though we miss the rest of the road. There is more road than gopher holes you know. I can't imagine you'd have gopher holes in the streets of gold in heaven. In fact, do you have gophers? I mean if you have one animal, don't you have two of everything? How would that work anyway? So, back to the road. The road we're given in life is always changing. Always new twists and turns. I'm finding that there is very little "straight stretch".  The one thing about the twists and turns is that you really never know what's coming next. Guess that's where faith comes in. I'm finding that in order to navigate the road I'm having to count on my faith more. For me, that means I'm having to trust the Lord more to get me over the gopher holes, around the curves and turns, over the hills and out to the straight-a-way. Faith doesn't come easy. It means I have to believe in someone bigger than me. (Knock it off! You know what I meant.) Anyway, for me, faith was a lot easier when dad and I were both working and you were younger. Maybe it just seemed that way because we could solve a lot of our own problems. Which, is not using faith at all is it? Hmm.

Without going into any detail just let me say that I've experienced some difficult changes this last week. They're something that I knew would happen eventually. Something that should happen and are right to happen. But when they did and do, I hate to say it, they really hurt. I guess you could say  I was headed up a hill and knew what was coming on the other side but the gopher hole caught me off guard. (TomTom doesn't show you everything in your path. Close, but not everything.) By the way, dad and I thank you and Kristin every single time we get in the car for the gift of your GPS before we left Springfield. It has been an amazing tool in making us independent on the road.)

Well, it's 7 p.m. Let's see if I can finish this one thought today. It's been a busy 24 hours. We had a great time with Josie. However, trying to have a concise thought with that bundle of energy around is another story altogether.

Life will always have it's ups and downs and go-arounds. There will always be gopher holes and turns in twists. There will always be my faith. All in all, as long as I use my faith as my GPS and practice what I preach I should be able to maneuver whatever comes along my way on this road called life.

Until next week, be Aaron, love mom