When are miracles huge? When are miracles tiny?

Okay, so I'm not getting done what I intended on doing today.  I did, and am however, getting some things done. I didn't intend on writing this blog this morning.  It just happens when it happens. I just have something on my mind and wanted to share it.  Of course, when is that not ever true!

I'm finally at the picture hanging stage.  Should finish up most of that today.  Ray and I are also going to hang curtain rods and roman shades.  The next task is the studio which I have not even touched but want to have done before we leave on the 23rd for Oregon.  We do have a pathway to Ray's closet in that room though.  Does that count? Ray got the air conditioners installed yesterday just in time.  It was 94 yesterday and is predicted to be 96 today.  Our house is set up pretty well so that we only had to install 2 of the 3 right now.  When I get the guest room set up we'll put the 3rd one in there.  It seems we have a never ending list: clean and wash the car, hang blinds, organize basement and set up shop area, scrub down and clean entry hall to front door (this area is used by all three floor but it's current condition is not working for either Ray or me), get Jamison trimmed (tomorrow), scrub down kitchen, re-do laundry (never ends), finish hanging pictures, set up studio, transfer 17 chickens to new home, clean off front porch and back deck and all the usual stuff just like everyone else. 

Not my window but you get the idea

Okay, so now who defines what is a huge miracle and what is a tiny miracle?  I think it's all in the eye of the receiver.  I mean if I only have $20 to budget toward bamboo roman shades for my living room, what are the odds of that happening.  Well, if I believed in the odds we wouldn't be having this one-sided conversation now would we?.  The roman shade bamboo blinds at Home Depot cost $40 each. So last week, I pick up the cheaper version, matchstick blinds, which I've used often but they only last a season usually and decided to be happy with those. Sunday we decided to put them up and found that they are about 1" narrower than I actually need. Since I didn't have the money to spend $80 on the roman shades I decided to return the matchstick blinds and be content with the mini-blinds that are already hanging at the windows.  (Now anyone who knows me just the least little bit knows that I despise mini-blinds.  This was a huge concession for me.)  Yesterday we made a trip to Latham (about 5 miles from Troy but a vast shopping center) to their Home Depot so I could return the matchstick blinds and pick up some brackets for the absolutely gorgeous curtain rods that Corey gave me.  Ooh, ooh, I've got to tell you about that too.  Hope I can remember when I get finished here!  Anyway, we had Jamison with us and it was already 72 at 9:30 am so we didn't want to leave him in the car by himself...too hot, so Ray went in and returned the items I had and also what he had left after installing the air conditioners.  He came back, we switched and I took the money and went in to look for brackets. As I'm cruising through the aisles I figure as long as I'm there I might as well dream a little, so I'm looking at light fixtures for the dining room, dreaming, and as I wonder by the next aisle over I'm in the aisle for curtain brackets and right behind me are the bamboo shades.  Are you ready, cause I wasn't and I had to look three times to make sure it was the right size for the price.  The $40 blinds I wanted were marked down to $10 each!   I know, I couldn't believe it either!  So, is that a huge miracle, or a tiny miracle?  Are ya kiddin' me, it's a miracle, who cares huge or tiny.  God works them every day according to our need and His plan.  I got so excited I forgot about the curtain brackets and we had to go back.  Found those too. 

Okay, now curtain rods.  I had an idea in mind for window valances and already had all that I needed that worked perfectly with the exception of two windows.  I have 9 windows that need valances. I really wanted "fancy" rods for the valances but when I checked I just didn't think I should spend $15-$20 per window for curtain rods so I decided to be content with the standard rod.  Corey called that day and asked what I was up to and I told her putting up curtains. She said, "Aunt Jan, I have zillions of beautiful curtain rods in the basement, let me bring them over and you pick what you need."  So I did!  Hugh miracle or tiny miracle?  Who cares! It's a miracle to me every time God gives me what I need.  But when He allows me a desire and not a need?  That's a super-dooper miracle!

Yes, while I'm talking about miracles I should tell you I never give up on praying that God will provide a miracle and take Aaron's cancer away. That He will leave him here with all his talent and compassion.  That He will give him a long and prosperous life.  That is my prayer every day from a mother's heart.  How am I going to handle that if that miracle doesn't occur.  I don't know.  I hope I can handle it with grace and live by the example my son has been setting for me since he was diagnosed.  As you know Aaron believes that God has a plan.  He might not like it, but he will do it.  I too am trying to live by this principle.  Aaron makes it sound so easy.  His example is one I will never be able to match.  I know that I would not have the grace my son exhibits every day if I were living with the knowledge that my time is as short as his time.  Aaron is so strong and confident in his life with the Lord.  I'm not saying it isn't difficult for him.  Now he is in constant pain.  It never goes away.  He's having to up his medications and pretty soon he'll sleep more than he is awake.  He's been enduring more pain than he should because he doesn't want to sleep the rest of his life away.  I can't say that I blame him but I can say I'm afraid I know that I wouldn't have the grace to accept a path such as his if God had given it to me. The grace and stamina he shows every minute of every day can only come from God and his belief in God and for that I am ever so thankful.  Thank you son for the example you continue to be; for the life example you set and for exceeding the standard of the life you have been given. I will love you always and there isn't a moment of any day where I am not proud of the man of God you are.



We were trying to get out of here by July 20th but couldn't get tickets until July 23rd.  We thought about leaving from Logan in Boston but it's a three hour drive and parking is over $150.  Not in our budget.  The upside was that is was straight through, no plane changes.  The downside was that that's probably not good for either me or Ray because of hips and knees.  On return it would have been red-eye, literally, and then a three hour trip home once we arrived at Boston.  We decided we don't have that much spring in our step any more.  We're excited to see our son and Kristin and touch bases with friends while there.  It's going to be wonderful to be able to do Relay for Life with Aaron again this year.  He most likely won't be able to do many hours this year but he does want to do the survivor lap and visit when he is able. 


Cherish what God has given you whether you consider it huge or tiny.  Miracles and life should never be taken for granted.